Disclaimer: I’m sorry if this is the 50,000th story that you’ve read about 50 Shades of Smut today.
I was having dinner with someone around this time last year and telling her about my book with the first edition about to come out. She just shut me down, saying “I don’t read science fiction. I’m reading 50 Shades now.” I tried to tell her why she should give my book a chance, but she just kept babbling on and on about Christian Grey and the trilogy. And that is how I learned it was a trilogy. (Why, yes, she is still alive. For now. Why do you ask?) Okay, I know sex sells. But perversion? Have we as a society have devolved into something so vulgar and debase that even the ancient Romans with their gladiator games and orgies of debauchery would look at us and say “Ooooh, too much!” Wait … don’t answer that! Now I’m not even going to get to EL James writing style, as I still have to work on my own, but I don’t get why people don’t bother just using their imaginations anymore. The Bronte Sisters, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Ernest Hemingway – they knew what they were sayin’ without sayin’ it yet we know what they were sayin’. You know what I’m sayin’? Or more recently there’s Snow Child by Eowin Ivey. Beautiful book recommended to me by a high school friend. Without giving too much away, the girl gets knocked up not exactly by Immaculate Conception and yet it’s done beautifully without being explicit. I guess my point to this post is I’d rather be a Gypsy Rose type of gal. I’d rather “Make ’em beg for more, and then don’t give it to them!” And if that means lower (which in my case means negative – is that even possible???) sales, then so be it.
But if 50 Shades is still your thing, might I suggest this lovely albeit NSFW reading. Ah, Gineriella, my fellow NU alum, my fellow human counterpart to Grumpy Cat, my sister from another mother (and father). I love her so much that I wouldn’t even hurt her if she totally trashed Order of The Dimensions. Okay I would, but I would also make sure that her death would not be as painful as the others.